Love will keep us together if we remember to exercise it. Choose Love.
In the next few days, weeks and maybe longer we will all be faced with decisions in our lives that will affect others. Some immediately and some long term. I ask you when you are making those decisions before you act on them, think about those choices. I ask you, no I implore you, to choose love.
Before you stockpile for your family only, ask yourself, “Am I choosing Love at this moment?”
Before you go out instead of social distancing, ask yourself, “Am I choosing Love at this moment?”
Before you go to work instead of working from home ask yourself, “Am I choosing Love at this moment?”
You may think I am being overly dramatic in my words and maybe to you, a healthy, uncompromised person, maybe I am.
But I am a two-time cancer fighter and barely out of my second bout with it. I now have Hashimoto’s autoimmune disease. If I got sick, it would be dire. There are others like me or who are older, have illnesses like mine or worse. We are not as healthy as you, and you may be putting us at risk.
I am writing this hoping it is a matter of “I didn’t think about it that way.” Instead of a matter of “I could care less.”
All I am asking is that you stop and think about your actions, your words, your behavior.
We have the capability to get through this on one condition…if we do it together.
Not just the United States, I mean the World!
We the WORLD can get through this together!
I truly believe we can accomplish that through love.
If my title intrigued you I hope you will stay to read the rest because this subject has been weighing on me for quite some time. I wasn’t even sure which blog to write it on since I have this blog that reaches a larger audience and my personal blog that is more of my close-knit friends, though it is open to the public.
Let backtrack a bit for those who don’t know my recent journey.
In recent years I have had cancer, not once, but twice. When I first found out I had cancer, most of my friends and some of my family rallied around me to be supportive. I went into remission for a year and then sadly my cancer came back with a vengeance. The second time it came around, I was more involved in Toastmasters and more friends rallied around, more family rallied and more letters and support showed. This time we figured out how to video chat, how to be a better support to me and help me with my needs.
Both times, once I was well, friends went dark, the family fell off the face of the earth and I was left in the dark cold turkey.
I am a strong, resilient person and I know I should take it as a compliment that people feel like once I am well that I can handle things on my own.
The thing is, what they don’t realize is how hard it is to move forward after you have had all that support to be left with no support.
No more video chats
No more calls
The letters slow down or come to halt
The care packages stop
The check-ins to see how you are don’t happen
The soft way people talk to you stops
The compassion seems to have left the building
Even the strongest person has a hard time recovering after a trauma like cancer and when all the compassionate caring stops, it is like going through withdrawals.
If you have followed my blog for a while or you know me, you know I am going to be upfront and honest about how I feel.
Vulnerable and all.
I feel like I am having to quit “attention” from others’ care and love, cold turkey.
Since last fall when I was told I was cancer-free and the tests were good, I have been severely depressed and struggling.
Imagine a person suffering from an addiction to a drug and then they are removed from it cold turkey with nothing.
My drug, however, was compassion from others. That compassion was a swarming form of attention and to be honest, not having it, is hard. I miss it.
Deep down in my heart, I know my friends care and love me. The “addict” per se in me, however, is saying, I don’t matter anymore and I only mattered when it was life-threatening. I know in reality that it is just negative self-talk and untrue.
I am talking to my therapist to refill that void with other things again.
Doing service for others
Doing good for others
Remembering my purpose and meaning in this life and fulfilling that purpose
Getting back involved in Toastmasters
Developing a workout routine
Going for walks on a regular basis
Meeting with friends or calling friends
Reaching out to family
Scheduling more travel and road trips
Finding retreats or getaways I might be interested in
While I know it’s on me to lift myself out of this depression and being who I am, I will.
I wanted to write this for those of you who might be currently supporting or befriending someone who is going through Cancer or any other severe illness right now or who might have a friend who just went into remission.
If things are still looking grim you are probably still there for them, helping them out, being support and I am sure they are thankful for that and I am thankful to you for being there for me and thankful to my friends who were there for me.
If you want to know how to best support your friends while they are going from “I had cancer or this life-threatening illness” to “I survived and I am going to make it”…
Here are some key ways to support them AFTER they are well so you don’t put them into a state of Cold Turkey shock like I am going through:
Text them every now and then to let them know you still care and are happy they are well
Send them a card that shows that little bit of extra effort that you cared enough to write something and put a stamp on it.
Call them if you can. If you were able to make the time before, try to make the time again, even if it’s not as much.
Schedule a visit with them or an outing together. They are finally well and able to get out of the house. Go have fun with them
Remember that even though they are well, they might still be scared about their illness returning and still need your friendship. Also, the people you may think are the strongest are probably the ones who are not ones to burden others with their problems, so they won’t tell you when they need you, or are sad or are depressed.
Robin Williams surprised the nation by taking his life.
Kate Spade’s father said he spoke to her earlier in the day and she was planning a trip.
You just never know.
Don’t stop showing your friends you care, especially those who have gone through some pretty major things in their life, like trauma or illness.
Those are the ones who really need you the most.
When you go cold-turkey on them, it is like quitting the hardest drug they ever had to quit because whether you realize or not, your friendship means more to them than you could possibly imagine.
You don’t have to be there 100%, just don’t go from 100% to 0% in a day.
Yesterday, which would have been my Trixie Tuesday, I just couldn’t. Anything.
I canceled my Ukelele lesson, I canceled my appointments, I pulled the blackout curtains back to where they were, I turned the heating blanket back on and I literally crawled back into the covers and stayed there pretty much all day.
I watch the Bachelor Episode I missed.
I watched some other TV on Hulu.
I slept.
I fed the kitten I am pet-sitting and my cats. I tried to play with the kitten and the cats to get some joy in that. Nope. Back to bed, I went.
I don’t talk about my other issues often because I have been facing and dealing with my Cancer so much in the past few years that the other issues kind of got jumbled in all of it.
The issues I am referring to are:
my Bi-polar,
my Aspergers,
and now my Thyroid,
which does not play well with those other ones, by the way.
The Bipolar diagnosis has been up and down. One time they will say I have it and then they say I don’t. Another time they will say I have Cyclothymia, which is similar, but because I am able to get myself out of my depression, this is why they say I don’t have Bipolar.
The Aspergers and Bipolar are not a good combo because being an Aspie is hard enough. I have no filter. I have a lack of boundary understanding. (this is also a bipolar issue) Now add the Thyroid. As of late, they said I have Hypothyroidism/Hashimotos Auto-Immune Disease. That adds a layer of depression.
Then add my pain issues:
I have Degenerative Disk Disease in my neck and lower back.
I am always in pain. Always. I just don’t go around griping about it to everyone. I live at a level 6-8 pain level nearly all the time. I do what I can.
I am human.
I have hard days and I have good days.
I have days that I crash and just can’t. For years I did not speak about these days. Since having cancer twice I feel it is my duty to help others. I have been given the gift of empathy. I know what others are going through because I have been there myself. A LOT in life. I mean…A LOT.
A huge part of helping others is being open and vulnerable.
How many other people are dealing with things like I am and feel like they are alone?
How many others feel like no one understands?
How many others are happy most of the time, but when they are struggling or not happy their friends say “cheer up.”
We need to be able to have our down days too!
Life cannot be all sunshine and lollipops all the time.
We must know the bitterness to enjoy the sweet.
I am here to tell you…it’s okay!
Some days…you just CAN’T.
Take the day.
Just don’t take too many days. Make sure you pick yourself back up. Dust yourself back off. Pull up your bootstraps. Ride into the sunset. Tomorrow is a new day.
What single quality differentiates high-potential leaders from ordinary contributors in an organization?
It’s their ability to be forward-looking and focus on the future. To become a better leader or distinguish yourself as someone primed for promotion, you’ll want to develop your capacity to envision the future.
“…if they meet with clients or anyone outside the company on a regular basis or are responsible for being the face of the company, as in reception work, then they are in a forward facing or client facing job.”
After reading both of this, I figured out what she meant. She was trying to tell me, I was not representing myself in the best light as the face of the company…in her opinion.
In Her Opinion
are the Key Words here.
While this group organization or perhaps herself, does not feel that I was presenting my best face forward, I tend to disagree not because she is directing it towards me, but because the face of my brand is
REALITY| AUTHENTICITY| HONESTY
I am who I am online, in real life, and in everything I do.
What she felt was not correct was how I presented myself online. However, I was being myself.
The funnier thing is in her email she states that she loves me as a human and thinks I’m fabulous, however, I need to be “different” online. Um….hi did you hear what you just said?
So, you want me to be fake online to “look better” than who I really am?
No thank you.
One thing I pride myself in being REAL to a fault.
I understand that means not everyone will like me in real life or online.
True, real, authenticity to me is being vulnerable enough to really be who you really are. ALWAYS. Not just when it suits you.
I spoke my mind and I ask questions.
I have Aspergers and many times do not understand things. This type of questioning makes other nervous. This type of real speaking up about how I feel about something isn’t always the norm and thus, I get criticized for saying and doing things others would not say. They generally would not say them, because society has told us not to. I laugh in the face of society. They deem people like me, with Aspergers, aka HFA (High Functioning Autism) as
NOT NORMAL
What is normal? Whose to say the way you view forward facing is correct and the way I view it is wrong? Neither is right. Neither is wrong. It is merely an interpretation.
I am Forward Facing.
I know I am my brand.
I know I am the face of my brand and I do all I can to be the best brand image of myself inside and out ALWAYS, by the way.
I do that by being real.
By being who I really am and not sugar coating life.
How do you become future-oriented and still handle day-to-day challenges? (The Hunt)
I will admit, the last couple of year battling Colon Cancer, Fighting it, OVercoming it and trying to get healthy again had their toll on me. It is hard to look forward when you don’t know what forward is and how many years that means. But even still I did my best.
I made 1 year, 3 year and 10-year goals and plans using the Dragontree Planner, not knowing if I would live to accomplish them. I put the pen to paper and wrote it all out. I made vision boards looking and hoping towards the future.
While the ability to focus on the future separates leaders from the rank-and-file, many of us fail to understand and appreciate its importance. We devote almost no time to developing this vital quality, which then becomes a huge barrier to future success. In today’s difficult times, people need to be reminded of why they are doing what they do — and why it matters.
Both Articles from The Hunt and Work Coach Cafe has some really good material for those in a workforce who are looking to develop this mentality better. I want to focus on people like me who are the face of the company or trying to be.
Next, start publishing content regularly, under your own name — not your brand’s. Reveal bits of your personality throughout your writing process, so people get to know you through your material.
It does not say be fake online and a different person in real life. It says Be Yourself.
Again, not everyone is going to agree and not everyone will like the style or method or way you speak, talk, or post. It also does not say sugar coat who you are or who your brand is. Being you is the best you that you can be. I am the best me I can be and sadly, if that means a group won’t like my posts or like me, then so be it. As one of the articles stated…
Why would you want to be around people that uptight anyway?
I fully concur.
Lastly,
I want to leave with you one little tidbit from Chron
Develop a Thick Skin
When you put yourself out there, you should expect to receive negative comments and reactions to everything from your hairstyle to your message. As the face of the company, you must maintain a professional image at all times and learn how to respond appropriately to criticism. A sense of humor helps in many situations, especially when the rebukes take place in a public forum. Maintain your composure and develop a routine for handling negative remarks. Take a deep breath, count to 10 or think about the money you’re earning from the publicity before responding in print, online or in person to the digs and jabs you can expect as the face of your company.
I said “Thank you” to the leader who said this to me. I also removed myself from her group and took a step back to evaluate what she said. This happened about a week or so ago and I didn’t want to react in haste or hurt.
My way of moving on was to write this blog. I did not name names, nor will I. She knows who she is and maybe one day will read this, maybe not. Not my problem or concern.
I wrote this blog to alert others of this mentality and mostly to be aware of it.
You may take to it differently than I did and that is totally fine. You are allowed. I encourage you to because I know then that you are thinking for yourself.
We have enough sheep in this world, we don’t’ need more.
We also have way too much sugar in America and maybe one huge lesson I learned from France was a little less sugar and a little more reality could do us some good here in America.
Everywhere I turn there are all these great conferences, coaches, courses and such but every single one of them is over $1000! I find this fee to be absurd! What if feels like to me is other people trying to steal my hard earned $$ for their own benefit. This is NOT the way I want to work this year. I want to offer up my services organically for those who need it but maybe can’t afford those $1000 programs. I know I can’t. How’s a gal supposed to get along in life and biz if I am always having to shell out $1000?
I go to a network function and the opt-in at the end for a gal, just like me, for her course, is, yep, you guessed it $1000 or more.
I go to a start up week event and the opt-in for the next level of the event is yep, $1000
I find this to be absurd!
They get with “get rich quick” schemes and “follow THIS PLAN” and “you too could be this rich” and yet people fall for it. How do I know people fall for it? I see my friends shelling out dollars after dollars, all the while they are struggling to pay for kids schools and meals and take care of car rides and baby sitting and wondering why none of their friends want to help them watch their kids. How can they not see that the only ones who are making the money are the ones at the top who have already been doing this for years?
Don’t get me wrong. I am not saying there is nothing to be learned by these people who have had success. There is. However. Buy their book. Watch their podcast. Keep your butt at home where you can afford it. There is so much to be learned online. In books. On You Tube. Via Skype. And so on. I just do not understand why people need to spend money on airline tickets, hotels, conferences, and such. It all just seems like brainwashing to me.
The “Thousandeers” as I like to call them, the ones telling you to give them $1000 or more have figured out…”Hey, if I get 200 people to give me $1000 Ill make $200,000 without batting an eye. I don’t have to work as hard and all I have to do is act like I know what I am talking about. I could sell ice cream to an Eskimo, so that should be easy!”
See, they are good at selling.
You, are good at listening.
They are good at persuasion.
You are good at opening your wallet.
You want what they’ve got.
you think by giving them your money you will get what they’ve got.
However, just by giving them you’re money, you fail to realize, you don’t have their life, their bills (or lack therof) their accountant, their lifestyle, and so on.
I am in no way trying to be a downer. I am not trying to be negative, although I am sure to them I am being just that.
I want to EDUCATE you.
You DO NOT NEED TO GIVE THEM $1000 or more.
You do not NEED what they have.
What I am trying to say is the same thing as what Glinda the good witch told Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz….
“you had the power all along my dear…”
YOU already have the answer you need inside you.
You don’t need someone to tell you how to have a great relationship.
You don’t need someone to tell you how to manage your money.
You don’t need someone to tell you how to do anything.
Guidance.
Now, THAT, you may need.
There are plenty of people, honest, good people who won’t take you for all you’ve got to help you do that. I know them. I am friends with them. They are in Chambers of commerce most likely in your area. Local folks. Mom and pop chops. A computer repair guy down the street who can fix that computer. An accountant friend who can help you manage your money and pay yourself in your own business. A healer, who can do amazing sound healing on you. An intuitive counselor, who can help you heal your broken heart.
Please consider this. Stop making the wealthy more wealthy. Help the locals support the locals.
Use sites like http://www.nextdoor.com and http://www.thumbtack.com and look around your neighborhood to find your needs. Talk to friends and family. look online. Ask GOOGLE or other sites for answers. If you are a business, talk to Chamber of Commerce or Network groups. and when you hear those crazy $1000 or more Opt-ins. Get up walk in or turn your paper over. Say no thanks.
Save your dollars and cents…common sense…
not only will it save the cents in your pocket…but it will save the sense in your soul as well.
There is this great little book called the Pursuit of Excellence and it helps you with goals and desires to become a better person. In finding this, I decided this year my quest is on The Pursuit of Excellence and these are my Challenges I am going to and have been taking on this year! I added them to my ASANA (Project Tracking Tool) and this way I can monitor my success and measure my statistics on how I am doing and have Asana as my own Accountability Coach!
This pamphlet encourages individuals to pursue excellence in their lives by setting goals and working diligently to achieve them. It includes several achievement challenges.
POE: Spiritual Challenges:
Strengthen your spiritual testimony
Study Spiritual Work from Spiritual Leaders
Share Spiritual Quotes via Social Media to uplift and inspire others
Develop a personal file of teachings, articles, home, family & friend enrichment ideas, quotes, thoughts, anecdotes, and spiritual experiences
Keep a Personal Journal
Establish a habit of daily Meditation
Freely forgive others
Accept opportunities to speak or teach
Record memorable spiritual experiences or events in a journal
POE: Intellectual Challenges:
Pray to know what gifts have been given you, and use one of those gifts to bless others.
Study the words of leaders about strengthening families, marriages, and homes.Read a book that will increase your faith and strengthen you spiritually.
Learn about and develop a new skill or interest.
Improve your ability to communicate with others
Learn more about Aspergers and Autism
Improve skills for an occupation.
Improve your employment opportunities.
Complete a degree or certificate program
Learn another language
Learn to budget wisely and manage personal finances.
Develop a plan of preparedness for emergencies
Acquire greater proficiency in an occupational or homemaking skill (such as organizing, using a computer, sewing, mechanical work, cooking, or cleaning).
POE: Physical Challenges:
Develop healthy eating habits and patterns
Learn to cook healthy foods.
Develop a program of regular exercise.
Work toward healthy sleep patterns.
Improve emotional and mental health.
Improve your personal appearance or hygiene.
Create opportunities to be active with family and friends.
POE: Service Challenges:
Pray for inspiration about who needs your help each day, and act on your inspiration.
Welcome or befriend a new person
Volunteer for or lead a service project in your community.
Find ways to be a friend and serve someone who is elderly.
Write encouraging letters to others and send
Assist someone who needs help with their education.
POE: Character Challenges:
Overcome a bad habit or addiction
Improve your ability to manage time wisely.
Learn to be grateful, and express your appreciation.
Choose friends and companions who are earnestly seeking to maintain high ideals and standards.
Cultivate patience and tolerance for others.
Avoid comparing yourself to others, and learn to recognize when you are doing your best.
Beware of pride, and seek to be humble and teachable
If you would like to get your own Pursuit of Excellence Book Order here
A long time ago, back in 2011, I had a dream about doors. In this dream I walked up to a door and I opened it. I came upon a long hallway filled with many other doors. Each door was different.
One door was see thru
One door had an easy handle on it
One door had a lock on it
One door was a french door and had two doors that opened inward
One door had a thousand locks on it of varying types and sizes and colors
Each door was different…
There was door after door.
As I walked down the hallways, I would try to open some of the doors.
Some doors wold open easy and I would find myself down ANOTHER hallway with MORE doors or MANY different handles, locks, colors etc.
A few nights later, I would have the dream again and so on.
One night, I woke up and sketched all these doors.
Later, in a metaphysical course at the School of Metaphysics in Des Moines, Iowa I was with someone who was taking a dream interpretation course. I asked the leader about this dream.
They said this is my life, my opportunities, my challenges, my world. the World of Trisha Trixie and it was showing me how life is filled with many doors. Some others open for you and let you in. Some you have to knock on and allow others to open. Some you have to have the key. Some you have to go through a few doors before you get to where you are going. Some have windows so you can see whats inside before you open and some you just have to take a chance and see what is on the other side…and so on and so forth… the explanations went on.
Fast forward until now…
I have been reading books on mindfulness, peace, inner peace, being at one, being present, being in the here and now….
As I was reading Thich Nhat Hanh this morning, it hit me…it was like a flashback to a dream…
I have been mostly at peace for some time now since 2011. Many things have happened for me and my world has changed, it has opened up, it has become different and new and fabulous in so many ways…and now I know why…
I had an epiphany…
Those doors, those doors that I dreamt about so long ago, those doors are the doors of life…
Doors of happiness
Doors of fulfillment
Doors of contentment
Doors of success
Doors of Friendship
Doors of change
Doors of elation
Doors of opportunity….
and I have gone through them to the other side…
Well, I am not quite FULLY there, however, I realized this morning that I have opened MANY of those doors. I found the key to some of them, like in a video game, while walking along, BUMP I walked over something and a bubble popped over my head and stated clearly what it was “You have found the Key!” Which then I tried that key and other key in every door I could until a door opened. I did this over and over until other doors opened…
My key ring is full of random keys that have oepned many doors. I have been carrying them around with me, thinking I might need them again…what if I get locked out…what if I need to help someone else get thru?
Today, however, I dropped those keys so I could pick up something else. (you know in video game you can only hold so many things. Sometimes you have to drop one to get something better)
Today, I picked up the ONE KEY I need for them all. I do need to hold to it tightly, so I am making a metaphorical lanyard and hanging this key around my neck. The lanyard is simple, nothing fancy. It doesn’t need to be. Because THE KEY is the most beautiful thing in the world. I know it will always be that way. I just need to see it for what it is and I will see it as beautiful, wonderful, magical, because it is.
It is the
The Key of Inner Peace
Nothing else matters when you have Inner Peace.
Lady at the store cuts you off and gets in front of you? No biggie, I have Inner peace. Maybe she was more in a hurry than I was.
Somebody steals from you? My motto always has been and still is, the fat that when others steal from me, I know they will get their kharama AND I feel like they must have needed it more than me. I thank God for helping me get rid of that item so it could open the way for something better.
I am no expert on all of this, of course.
It is a recent revelation.
Perhaps five years from now, who knows where my enlightenment might be.
I can say however, that for my dream of doors, a realization swept over me, like a cool breeze on a hot day, that the answer to that dream is the key of inner peace.
I have felt such contentment lately, such bliss, such elation, such happiness….
Where did that come from?
The fact that I have now learned to let go and let god.
Turn the page, as my mother says.
Go wash your hands and visualize your problems, worries, issues etc down the drain and come out clean, refreshed and happy. this is a visualization I do often and have since i was 16 years old.
Today is a new day. Each moment is new and fresh. Each lesson is there for a reason and above all
All you can do is take it in stride and be in the moment…
Every Moment…Be Present
Whether it is good or bad that is happening to you, be present, take it in and breathe and move on…
Each day we are given choices. choices to allow things, people, places, etc to affect us in a variety of ways. WE can allow ourselves to be angry, happy, sad, and so on. The choice is up to us.
We are a result of the choices we have and will make.
Choose Wisely…and remember my motto…
When given the option of being fabulous, why would you choose anything else?
Today’s lesson comes from my favorite topics (insert sarcasm here)…
Using Facebook or other social media messaging tools for conversations and the confusion between using them for business reasons.
Whew! That was longwinded, huh? But I wanted to get it all out, then explain.
In person, I am personable, light, fun airy, and most people say a joy to be around. (or so I am told)
However, for some reason in text, messaging etc, I come off rude, stark, strong, abrasive and offensive.
Why?
Because conversing in this manner removes TONE.
When you can’t hear the tone in a persons voice you either hear tone in YOUR head the way YOU think it sounds (probably from past experiences with others or insecurities in yourself, just sayin).
Thus I deem to share with all, please stop doing business and having serious conversations over TEXT, email, and most of all, Social Messaging tools like FB messaging etc.
If you catch yourself doing this, stop the convo and ask to call them.
I have found, however, many people fear that dreaded phone for some reason. When did we get to be such wussies about talking on the phone anymore? It’s unreal.
My niece has a great system, after a few , like 4 or more texts, she asks you to call her or she will call you. I love it. So I have adopted that rule too. however I was only using it for texts until recently.
Twice now in the past month a simple conversation has gotten into a heated convo and then frustration and in one case, ended up with the loss of a relatively new friend and business partner.
I will share, that in my opinion, the use of this was both our faults and it taught me a good lesson to not do that anymore.
From now on, if someone needs to talk to me, they need to pick up the phone. This is my new boundary. to keep these messaging devices for quick convos.
I am going to start also asking for people’s REAL email and get away from FB messaging. I wish I could shut the damn thing off. Twitter DM too. These tools were intended for quick messaging and chatting, not debates and business.
Do yourself and your business a favor…pick up the phone.
It will be good for you and the other person to hear tone and inflection as well as being able to resolve things a lot quicker when you don’t have to type to explain. It is also known facts that in person or phone calls helps us to bond better with the one we are talking to. Business or otherwise, connecting and bonding with another can help business relationship, personal relationships and help you both feel much better.
Remember that old phone commercial
“Reach out and touch someone”
well if you text instead of call you may end up wanting to
That is the ultimate question. Indie sites, like Etsy, Farmer’s Markets, and Vendors shows as well as many of these other small handmade businesses are great. You are making money here and there. But after talking with a mentor this week the big question loomed out there.
do I want to do my passion and potentially make no money or do I want to be in business? This is the difference i the $10/$10,000…seriously.
Making money on Etsy is fine for some. It’s $10 here or there. If you are fine with that, then great. I have no problem with that. Maybe you only desire to have a little spending money. Or maybe you just want to earn something for what you love to do.
However, if you want to play with the big kids here is a few things I learned yesterday I actually had no real awareness about til now…
Today I am doing research on Business Models. This is not a model like walking down a runway. I am talking about the Business Model for your company or Brand…aka what you are selling.
For every product you make you have to look at it as 1,000 items not one.
If Modcloth, or Rebel Circus or QVC Lori Greiner from Shark Tank Modcloth wanted to sell my product I would need to make 1,000 of the same item to be sold in their inventory. That is how it works. (Ok I kinda knew a bit about this but not as much as I learned yesterday)
Every product you decide to make you have to ask yourself if this product is worthy of 1,000 of the same item being made?
Is this product something you want known as your brand?
Is this product something you desire to make 1,000 of?
Then there are the channels….
That is where you are selling your product or item
Retail
Consignment
Drop Ship
Etsy
Goodsmiths
Square Market
Shopify
Other
This is all alot to take in even for me and I know there is SO much m ore I am not even touching on because well, honestly, I don’t know it all. 🙂
I found this online and really like the explanation of it so I thought I would share…
Learning about your Goods and what you have and where it fits in this stream is a good thing to know.
I think it makes a difference in how you move forward…
I am currently looking up Business Models of brands I like and that inspired me.
Uniqlo is one of them. Here is their model
I am a lover of Modcloth. So when I was doing research for this blog I found this little diddy and fell in love with the story. Check out how Modcloth made it herehttp://mashable.com/2013/08/13/modcloth-scaling/
I am going to drop off this subject with this little board I saw and think this might be a good thing to find inmy notes from Leonie Dawson and Right Brain business Plan…I have something like this from them..Might be a good place to restart my engines..
Now we move onto to channels (or what I am learning about them anyway)
This is the old way
This is the new way (or so it seems to be the most)…Shop Channel sites like ones I mentioned earlier
Etsy
Goodsmiths
SquareMarket
Shopify
IndieMade
other (What are you using that I don’t have in this list so I can update my list…please comment)
My mentor challenged me to a couple of “homework” items to make some changes to change my thinking and how I am doing business based on the answer I gave him..
Which was..
I want to make $10,000, be in business and get off this presipus I am on.
Step one:
I need to make it easier for my customers to buy off my website. I have a lot of people who say they love my site www.trishatrixie.com
but the feedback from my customers is they have a hard time finding out HOW to buy things and WHERE to get things, HOW to order a custom Apron or Accesorry and so forth.
So I have to fix that.
I have these channels:
Brick and Mortor Stores:
Inspired Locally
Burlesque Hall of Fame
Green Goods for the Home
then I have two channels for online stores
Goodsmiths for my Comic Creations (Actions Aprons/ Superhero Inspired pieces etc)
and
Square Market for everything else
(I have two because Goodsmiths does not currently have an Andoird Swipe and Square does. However I have an Itouch and am going to test out if I can use the Swipe on the Itouch and that might alleviate some things)
then I have a Fashion Question Form for them to order Custom (but yet even that form is still unclear)
However people aren’t getting it…which leads to step two
Step Two…
Clean out old inventory if it did not sell.
Post pictures of current inventory ON my website and lead /drive them to the online channels
Have the picture DIRECT link to the BUY page of that item (why didn’t I think of that!!!?)
Step Three:
Take time to focus on my Residual Income idea now that I have the time because the third challenge is gonna be the hardest for me as a designer…
DON’T CREATE/MAKE ANYTHING ELSE
I whined…
so he said “Okay, don’t make anything new until something old is sold”
I can do that. 🙂
Now driving business to the page..and I learned it should be one page. This again, was a nice reinforcement as I somewhat already knew this. I used to have a apge for one thing, and then another page for another type and I had one prifle for one thing and one profile for another and so on. When I noticed Danielle La Porte and Susan Barconi Moe and many others were consolidating and turning everything to ONE palce to find it all, that’s when I started adopting this. I may have a few FB pages, but they all lead back to me.
My website it the same. I know (and listen up if you are not following this rule) that all your products should be able to be handled and found on ONE page. It is not good to have a page for one type of product and one page for another type. You WANT people to get to know YOU, your BRAND, who YOU are and to TRUST that brand. If you throw something new it, add it to your current brand under a different line. If your current brand or website does not embody that, then perhaps it is time for a change and time to rebirth your brand. Make your Business name or Brand so unique but simple no matter what you do could be under that brand. Thus why I am Trisha Trixie. Everything that I am falls under that. PinUp. Model. Fashionista. Blogger. Designer.
To some degree I am doing this, but since my shop sites are separate this has been where most of the confusion lies and why it has been an issue.
This has been a struggle for me which is why I was thinking oh I need a merchant account site or I need to pay and so on. How many of us in businesses like this think that way. But in the long run, I knwo there are workarounds and since WordPress.com offers FREE hosting, I have not wanted to go that route. I stare at pages like Shopify and groan thinking “but I like my site. Others like my site. Can’t I just make it better?”
Driving business I think is easier now that we have Social Media outlets like these…
I have seen a vast amount of upscale in sales since I have been using Twitter. But I do not have measureable goals and stats to prove that.
So that is Step Four:
Start Measuring.
Look at stats.
See what is working and what is not. Remove what is not. Make what is working better.
Hopefully, with all of this I will be able to proceed to the next level of sales. Also in cutting down what I am making perhaps it will allow me more time to work on the website idea I am doing, blog to drive more traffic, have time to write articles for magazines and start generating a different drive essentially thus again upping my sales.
Lastly,
as I said in the beginning. If you are fine with the way it is. Then that’s great. I enjoy designing, making creating, but I want more. Or, at least I think I do. With these tips we will see if I can do things this way. I think this will also answer my questions on Passion or Business?
I realize this means not as much creating and that is the positive sacrifice I am willing to take right now.
My desire (#CDF) in the end is to be #Profitable (ned to add) and these others listed here…
I am for the path that takes me there…
My yellow brick road is mine to color, create, sparkle and lead me to however I desire to go. It is up to me to lay each brick down the right way. Otherwise I could end up in some crazy tree land with poppies that steeer me off my path.
I will find my Oz.
One way…or another…I’m gonna find it…
Xoxo Trisha Trixie
One little tidbit I found for ya as I was looking for imags to add to this. Ways to Make Gobs of Money. Check it out.
So glad it was the last of my three sets of shows. Now this is not to say I won’t do any more because I will. However, I will be different and refined about what shows I do, how I advertise them and what I do and when. I was literally beginning to feel psychotic. I mean it. Crazed.
People trying to get in last minute, people trying to send replacements, people still badmouthing me from another show, and the race to advertise and send out press releases knowing full well that no matter what you do, some, or all of your vendors are going to be unhappy with you.
I have come to terms with a few lessons for myself and some tips for myself and others I thought might be helpful:
Do what you love.
When you stop loving it, it becomes work. I was not in love with the shows I was doing and how I was doing them so I changed the plan. Instead of going to shows, I put on shows. Then, I hated that too. So, unless it is a show I will like, no matter what, I refuse to do it.
The whole point is to stop complaining, stop griping and stop worrying, just Enjoy the Show. I apply this to my life as well as to the vendor shows. No matter what happens, I decided on this last one especially to just enjoy the show.
Make Love not War
Some of you might understand the reference. My point here is to be happy. Make friends. Make connections. Get leads. Get contacts. Get leads. Be happy about whatever outcome you get. Be Happy.
Stand Up Get Up Stand Up for your Right
Stand up at shows. If you have to get a cushioned mat or double up a towel to stand on do it. Sitting down at a show says tot he consumer “I am not engaged in your business”. Stand up, greet them, share with them a deal you are having. It makes a big difference. Also get out from behind the booth. Sit on the side or make your booth so you can be in front.
Put Down the Cellphone and No One Gets Hurt
So many times, sadly most especially NEW vendors or young vendors sit at a booth on their cell phones or smart phones. Again, if a customer walks by you and sees you on the phone, you are telling them you don’t care. Besides, not using it will save your batteries for when you need to use it to make a sale. Turn off your apps. Clear messages out. Put the phone down. If you are bored, bring things to do, or take time to talk to the vendors around you. Look at their displays. Network.
Learn from other Vendors
I have changed my booth and displays more than I can count. I do so because I learn from others by looking around at how they are displaying something ask ask them about it. If I really like it, I ask if they mind if I did something like it. Generally, most people are willing and desirous to share. This is also why it is good to put your cellphone down and engage in those around you. It will help you all be more successful.
Talk about your Brand
Develop your 3 minute spiel about your brand. Don’t make them feel like they can’t get away. Don’t talk for hours. Just give them a few tidbits. Share a deal. Answer questions. Ask them about their day, Ask them about the show. Ask them if they are looking for anything imparticular. At least , TALK. Don’t just sit there or stand there like a mouse. They don’t’ know your brand. You do.
The System
I have devised a new plan I am going to start implementing at all my shows from now on. I am going to adhere a sticker to my card or have special cards made per show that say the name or the date of the show. Why? Because then when someone calls me and says “ I got your card somewhere.” I can ask “Does it have a sticker on it or did it come with a special card?” Then they can tell me the date or what the card said and I can start entering it into a tracking system. This way I can see these thing in my new system
Vendor Show Name
Date(s) of the Show
Estimated # of people attended (came to my booth) ( if you make a certain # of items to give as mini gifts then you know how many stopped by the booth once those are gone)
Sales per show
Referral by someone at the show?
Response afterwards
By capturing this date, I then can tell which shows I get the most out of. I am even thinking of creating a Google Docs form that asks Show Survey. How did they hear about it? etc.
Last show I made 30 gifts. They were all gone. So I know at least 30 people came to the show. Then we had stragglers before AND after so I would say about 50 people probably stopped by. I wish it was more like 100 but hey, at least SOME people stopped in!!
Shows are for Leads, Sales are Nice
Most shows were created to get leads. Get info, get contacts. Share your brand. Get your cards out. If you get sales, that is great. It is like the dessert after a meal. This is why creating a Feedback or Survey even if only for yourself, is a good idea. Then you can see where those leads are coming from.
I hate it when others say “That show sucked, I didn’t make any money. I didn’t even get my booth rent back.” Well, honestly, how do you know that? Are you literally saying NO ONE took your card. No one will contact you for business? You didn’t book a aprty? You didn’t hand out your card? You didn’t talk to anyone? Unless you can answer those with NO’s, then you really dont know. Unless you are tracking results and you can see that nothing came in from that show. Then guess what….??? You did get SOMETHING out of it.
You got experience. You made connections. You also learned, Don’t do that show again. lol. Seriously. Or maybe you know about the location. You learned if a location of a show is good or bad.
GIVE FEEDBACK/ SUGGESTIONS
AS Vendor Planners, we DO appreciate feedback. Honestly. If you are unhappy or you have ideas how to make things better, contact us, tell us. We want to know. If you don’t tell us, how can we be better?
No Gossiping or Back Talking
Please just talk to the Vendor Planner. Don’t go talking smack about them. We will hear. I also have been bad about this to other planners. In an effort to help another planner be warned from a bad vendor, I perhaps have spoke too openly about it. I am not perfect and after it was brought to my attention, I realized that sharing my thoughts openly may not be taken the right way. It could potentially make ME look bad and that is not what I want of course. I am not perfect. But I can learn.
Family Emergency
Please use Family Emergency if it really IS a family Emergency. I had six people cancel on me last minute. Now either there was a major crisis this weekend, or some people used that as an excuse not a reason. Most vendor shows clearly state no refund. We are not going to change that because it is or isn’t a family emergency. You are a big kid. Just state. You will not be able to be there. Or tell the real reason if you must say anything. Either way you are not getting your money back, so why lie?
Check the Address BEFORE the Show
The planner should have sent out an email of all the info. The map or Google directions or the address. don’t rely on Social Media, use the info the planner sent you in the email. In a place like des moines, there is Des Moines, East Des Moines, South and West Des moines and many of the addresses sound alike.
Be on Time
If you checked the address, you shouldn’t have to worry about getting lost because you SHOULD know exactly where you are going. Thus, you should be on time. There should be a set up time (s) and you should be set up BY the time of the show. If you are gonna be late, please try to let the planner know. It is not the planners job to chase you down.
Get Confirmation, then Mark your Calendar
It is up to YOU to make sure you have been confirmed for the show and mark your calendars. Hearing “I forgot” lately however did not make me happy. The vendor could have at least tried to still attend my event.
Don’t Book too far in Advance: Replacements Not allowed
With a lot of vendors NOT allowing replacements, it is better for you to book only a month or two in advance, not a year. You will be out money and a replacement WON”T be allowed to show up.
………………………………..
I know that was a lot of info to digest but I didn’t want to forget to tell you things.
Please comment, send feedback or any other suggestions or questions you might have.
One thing I pride myself in being REAL to a fault.
Everywhere I turn there are all these great conferences, coaches, courses and such but every single one of them is over $1000! I find this fee to be absurd! What if feels like to me is other people trying to steal my hard earned $$ for their own benefit. This is NOT the way I want to work this year. I want to offer up my services organically for those who need it but maybe can’t afford those $1000 programs. I know I can’t. How’s a gal supposed to get along in life and biz if I am always having to shell out $1000?
TrishaTrixie™ Sprinkler of Fabulousness 
You must be logged in to post a comment.